Wednesday, May 23, 2007

President Tarantino on Terrorism

Yeah, I grasp that, Jules. All I'm doing is contemplating the ifs.
I don't wanna hear about no motherfuckin' ifs. All I wanna hear from your ass is, "You ain't got no problem, Jules. I'm on the motherfucker. Go back in there and chill them niggers out and wait for the cavalry, which should be coming directly."
You ain't got no problem, Jules. I'm on the motherfucker. Go back in there and chill them niggers out and wait for the Wolf, who should be coming directly.
You sendin' the Wolf?
Oh, you feel better, motherfucker?
Shit, yeah, negro. That's all you had to say.

News flash: al-Qaida’s in Iraq. Pass it on and tell the Wolfowitz since he‘s free now. He’ll hose us all and save us in the process.

You have to admit it takes a lot of chutzpah for anyone, including President Tarantino, to be playing the terror card in a non-election year. Because, according to him, "In the minds of al-Qaida leaders, 9/11 was just a down payment on violence yet to come." In other words, expect worse and you’d better keep voting Republican in ’08 unless you want another September 11th and then some.

Forget the fact that 9/11 happened on his and the GOP’s sleepy watch, forget the fact that our invasion and endless occupation of Iraq has, according to all 16 of our intelligence agencies, made us more vulnerable to terrorism than ever before. They’ll follow us to our shores like psychotic puppy dogs and strike terror into our hearts only worse!

Oh, and vote Republican in ’08.

And please ignore the fact that bin Laden got away time and again on my watch, that he has unconditional safe haven courtesy of one of our tyrant allies and that we’re letting the Taliban take back key cities and provinces in Afghanistan and that we’ve had going on seven years to help rid the world of terrorism and have only swelled their ranks. All them inconvenient partisan facts make for a slippery slope.

But the fact that al-Qaida is in Iraq, a fact that didn’t exist prior to the invasion, certainly is news to me. Iraq has proven to be flypaper to terrorists and only a psychopath like George W. Bush would use that as a rationale for staying in a country that is slowly supplanting its fleeing population with terrorists.

So let’s indefinitely keep the troops in a country that plainly doesn’t want them, and while we’re at it, let’s extend their tours of duty from twelve to fifteen months, cut their VA funding, send in more and more wounded troops and then deny them a 3.5% pay hike because we’d have to shell out an extra twenty cents a day. Yes, that’s what the difference is between 3% and 3.5%. Six dollars a month or twenty cents a day.

Fortunately, the newly empowered Democratic Congress is only too happy to oblige since they just took even non-binding troop withdrawal timetables off the table. Who’d a thunk it, that the Republican party would ever be right about anything?

The Democrats have stranded the troops.